Believe it or not all of these songs are actual songs... and if you Google some of the lyrics, you'll see that some of them actually make sense. Still, I wonder what these guys were smoking when they came up with these titles...
1. Thom Sharpe - I Don’t Know Whether to Kill Myself or Go Bowling
Well, if I were you, I wouldn't know what to do either.
2. Jimmy Buffet - My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus
Dude, I think you'd better go bowling.
3. Waylon Jennings - Get Your Tongue Out of my Mouth, I’m Kissing you Goodbye
4. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I'd Be Out Of Prison By Now
Would have been totally worth it too
5. Jimmy Buffet - If the Phone Doesn’t Ring, You’ll Know It’s Me
If I don't knock on your door, it's me too
6. And there was Grandma, Swinging on the Outhouse Door, without a shirt on
Weeeh! Grandma knows how to party!!
7. Dan Hicks - How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
Hey, I feel 4 u, man! I've had that same problem before
8. Austin Lounge Lizards - Jesus Loves Me But He Can't Stand You
I think it may be the other way around
9. Jerry Reed - She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)
Uh, what a surprise! Did you actually expect to keep the goldmine?
10. Phil Earhart - My wife ran off with my best friend and I sure do miss HIM
Hmmm... I love you, man! Please, come back!
11. Chuck Wagon - You Shot the TV but You Were Aiming at Me
Urgh! Where are we gonna watch Idol?
12. Ruby Wright - Billy Broke My Heart at Walgreens and I Cried All the Way to Sears
But I took a detour through IHOP and Baskin Robbins.
13. Gretchen Phillips - I Spent My Last Ten Dollars on Birth Control and Beer
But you still did not get laid.
14. Joe Nichols - Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off
Dude, can I get her number?
15. I Bought A Car From A Guy Who Stole My Girl, But It Don't Run, So
Not really, you could always get a refund for that car!
16. Johnny Cash - I've Been Flushed from the Bathroom of Your Heart
Hey, if yellow, let it mellow...
17. Conway Twitty & Loretta Lynn - You’re the Reason Our Kids Are Ugly
Some people should not be allowed to bear children
18. I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonite
Sorry, I divorced you yesterday.
19. I Got in at 2 with a 10 and Woke Up at 10 with a 2
You should have left at 6 when she was a 5.
20. Waylon Jennings - Too Dumb for NY, Too Ugly for LA
Dude, you got it backwards - you're too ugly for NY and too dumb for LA.
Next week: Top 20 long songs (over 8 minutes long)